Naked News, Tuesday March 31, 2020

Hello, everyone, I’m Eila Adams, and welcome to the last Naked News show of March! It’s truly been a life-changing month hasn’t it? And it’s crazy to think we’re really still at the beginning of this pandemic! That said, we’re already seeing a lot of effects… and Isabella’s got a few examples for you right now in our Naked Newsroom.

It seems for many, “in sickness and health” is just an expression! According to Page Six, New York’s top divorce attorneys have been experiencing a FIFTY PERCENT rise in inquiries! Much of this is just due to couples being bottled up together and driving each other crazy… but there’s a more sinister motive for some. With the market down, so are people’s net worths… meaning a quick divorce could result in a lower settlement! Long story short, fellas: a lot of trophy wives could soon be on the market!

No one should be talking about silver linings to the pandemic… but there have been some lessons worth holding on to. Case in point: during India’s nationwide lockdown, air pollution in some parts of the country has dropped to record lows! On the Real-Time Air Quality Index, Delhi’s particulate matter reading dropped from 165 on March 21st to just SIXTY-FOUR by the 29th! Obviously, to SUSTAIN this change will take policy, not a permanent lockdown, but it’s a good reminder how quickly things can change if we commit!

And we’re nowhere NEAR out of the woods just yet, but German researchers are preparing to take a big step forward. Specifically, they’re planning to issue “immunity certificates” to those who’ve recovered from COVID-19 and have the antibodies to operate safely in society. If the project’s approved, these scientists would begin testing the blood of over a hundred thousand people as early as April. Then, the hope is these tests will get more precise over the coming months. Good luck, all… or should I say, Good science! Don’t go away.